How to Ask for Money Instead of Wedding Gifts (Kindly)

A Kind, Clear Guide to Asking for Money (or Gifts) for Your Wedding

Let’s be honest—asking for money as a wedding gift can feel awkward.

You don’t want to sound greedy or ungrateful, but at the same time, you know what would actually be useful.

Whether it’s contributing to your honeymoon, saving for a home, or simply preferring cash over three toasters—this guide is here to help you navigate it kindly, clearly, and confidently.

We’ve helped hundreds of couples find the right words. Here’s everything we’ve learned.

 

What Couples Are Searching for Right Now

These are the real search phrases couples are typing into Google, Instagram, Pinterest, TikTok, and Reddit in 2025:

• Wishing well wording for wedding
• How to ask for money instead of gifts
• Wedding gift etiquette
• Wedding money gift poem
• How to ask for honeymoon fund
• What to write on wedding gift card
• Wedding gift alternatives
• Wishing well card examples
• Gift registry vs cash gifts
• Is it rude to ask for money for a wedding?

We’ll cover all of these—plus culturally respectful ways to approach it and wording you can literally copy and paste.

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Is It Okay to Ask for Money as a Wedding Gift?

Yes—and it’s more common than ever.

Couples are often:

• Already living together
• Saving for something big (like a house, IVF, or honeymoon)
• Planning to keep their wedding minimalist
• Wanting fewer things and more experiences

You’re not alone in this. The key is how you ask—and that’s where etiquette matters.

The Etiquette of Asking for Money (Without Making it Awkward)

Here’s how to ask without sounding pushy or transactional.

✅ Do:

•  Be polite, warm and transparent in your wording
•  Explain why you’re asking (e.g., honeymoon, savings goal)
• Keep the tone optional and pressure-free
• Put the message on a separate ‘Wishing Well’ or ‘Details’ card
• Offer a registry or alternate option if some guests prefer that

❌ Don’t:

• Print “CASH ONLY” or anything demanding
• Give your bank details and ask them to transfer money
• Mention specific amounts (unless it’s a group fund with a clear purpose)
• Place it on the front of your main invite
• Assume every guest is comfortable giving money

Remember: it's all about giving guests the choice and making them feel comfortable doing what’s right for them.

12 Wording Ideas for Your Wedding Wishing Well or Gift Card

We’ve written and refined a lot of these over the years—so here are our favourite go-to options, now fully updated to include how to give, where to give (at the reception), and what the gift is for.

Whether you want something sweet, formal, casual, or a little bit cheeky, here’s your copy-and-paste list.

Classic & Polite

1. Your presence at our wedding is the greatest gift of all.
   But should you wish to bless us with a gift, a contribution of money towards our future would be truly appreciated. A wishing well will be available at the reception for your envelope.
   
   
2. We’ve been lucky to build a home together and have all that we need.
   Instead of traditional gifts, we kindly ask for a gift of cash to help us on our next adventure. You're welcome to place your envelope in our wishing well at the reception.

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Honeymoon Fund

1. If you'd like to help us create memories instead of collecting things,
   A monetary gift towards our honeymoon would mean the world. Our wishing well will be at the reception for any contributions.
   
   
2. We’re off on a honeymoon adventure after the big day!
   If you’d like to contribute a little envelope love towards our trip, a wishing well will be available at the reception.

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Light & Humorous

1. We don’t need a toaster—our cupboards are full.
   But if you’d like to help fill our honeymoon fund instead, a gift of cash would be appreciated. The wishing well will be set up at the reception.
   
   
2. All we ask is your love and laughter.
   But if you'd like to give a little something extra, we’d love a cash gift towards our future together. You can drop it in the wishing well on the day.

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Short & Sweet

1. Gifts are not expected.
   But if you feel inclined, a little envelope of kindness can be placed in our wishing well at the reception.
   
   
2. If you're wondering what to get us,
   We're saving for our first home. A monetary gift would mean so much, and our wishing well will be ready at the reception.

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Group Gifting / Specific Funds

1. We’ve set up a wishing well to help us start our new chapter.
   If you’d like to contribute a monetary gift towards our [home/honeymoon/goal],
   The wishing well will be available at the reception.
   
   
2. We’re saving for something special.
   If you’d like to give a cash gift to help us get there, please place your envelope in the wishing well at the reception.

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With a Traditional Registry Option

1. We’re so grateful for your love and support.
   If you’d like to give a gift, we have both a registry and a wishing well available. Feel free to choose whichever feels right for you—envelopes can be placed in the wishing well at the reception.
   
   
2. We’ve included both a gift registry and a wishing well option.
   If you’d prefer to give a monetary gift, the wishing well will be set up at our reception for your convenience.

Looking for even more ideas?

We’ve created a free PDF download packed with extra wishing well and gift card wording. You can grab it here:

👉 paperandinkstudio.com.au/pages/wishing-well-wording

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Where Should You Put the Wishing Well Message?

Avoid the main invitation. Instead, include your wording on:

• A Wishing Well card
• Your Details card
• Or your wedding website

If you’re not sure how to word it or how to lay it out beautifully, we’d love to help.

You can book a consultation with us here:

paperandinkstudio.com.au/pages/book-a-consultation

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Cultural Traditions Around Wedding Gifts

In many cultures, giving money isn’t just accepted—it’s expected.

Here are a few traditions to keep in mind (especially if you're blending families or hosting guests from different backgrounds):

Chinese Weddings
Cash is traditionally given in red envelopes called “hongbao,” symbolising good fortune. Numbers ending in 8 are considered lucky, while amounts with 4 are avoided.

Indian Weddings
Monetary gifts are common, often in odd-numbered amounts like 101 or 501 for good luck. They're usually given in decorative envelopes.

Greek Weddings
Guests often pin money onto the couple while dancing or discreetly hand over envelopes at the reception. It’s a festive and expected tradition.

Italian Weddings
The “busta” (an envelope of cash) is the norm. Couples typically provide a box or satin bag at the reception for guests to place envelopes into.

Lebanese Weddings
Cash gifts are common and generously given, with families seeing it as a contribution to the couple’s new life together.

Knowing your guest mix can help you set the tone and wording with sensitivity and clarity.

Final Thoughts

Asking for money doesn’t have to be awkward.

With the right wording, tone, and a little bit of thoughtfulness, you can give your guests the option to contribute in a way that feels kind, respectful, and clear.

If you’d like help designing your wishing well or details card, or finding the perfect wording for your invitations, we’re here for it.

Book a consultation with us, and we’ll help you get this part just right.

Your wedding planning bestie,
Lala and Kellie xo